Thoughts
This is a space of musing, often about things I have read, watched or listened to.
I am reclaiming the digital realm as a space to share my thoughts as I pull ideas from across media and my own lived experience.
You are welcome to linger.
Happy Death Club, by Naomi Westerman
May 9th 2026
Book cover: black, featuring a skull wearing a pink party hat
"The films I watch align with my personal experience in that every woman I have ever met in my entire life is completely crazy, in one way or another." -- Kier-la Janisse
This book I read while deep in an energy crash of my own making. It make me laugh out loud, it made me wince, it made me deeply aware of the commonplace nature of grief and mourning.
It reminded me that grief is not just for people no longer with us. It is also for life no longer open to us. The nigh universal disabled experience of a lonely crip mourning the life they were promised and will never see.
Today, as my husband considers the notion of having a child with another woman, I mourn the future of children I am unable to bring into my life. An open wound within me. But I also consider the potential human that may be created and how I would love them as a part of my husband regardless of my relationship to their mother. How would that look? How could that look?
We have so few roadmaps for unconventional families... What new potential, what heartbreak and loss...
"Nothing happens. For years. I don't go outside. The walls close in. I pretty much spent every day convinced I was going to die for no apparent reason. But I didn't die. Sometimes you just carry on breathing, and that is the most you can do, and it's enough."